Monday, January 16, 2006

SPIRITUAL CHAOS THEORY

Ah, that good ol' fashioned hysterical overreaction. You see, if Ford sells cars to gay people, your parents are going to feel a sudden urge to get divorced. Now I know it seems like there's no causal connection between these two things, but that's only because you're stuck in your naturalistic thinking. If a butterfly flapping its wings in China can trigger a hurricane in Venezuela, then a gay person buying a car in Massachusetts can destroy a family in Texas. Call it "spiritual chaos theory".

Then again, given that the divorce rate in Texas is already 2.5 times higher than the divorce rate in Massachusetts, and the rate of teen pregnancy in Texas was almost double that of Massachusetts, they seem to be doing a fine job of destroying families all on their own. The obvious explanation, of course, is that gay people in Texas (all 28 of them) buy a lot of cars.

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